Thursday, March 14, 2013

What Have We Missed?

It may take you less than 15 minutes to read through the whole rant, but it takes me at least five hours to finish writing, so to hell with proof-reading and spell-checks!

Do you love me enough to care about what is going on with me now?? :p :p

Oh my, oh my; my heart sinks to see the last time I've posted something here (my word-strings does not count as posts; only ramblings are!). 

I love to write my thoughts because I have never been good at saying them in words spontaneously. I'd say I'm a rather slow verbal communicator.

A lot have changed since January. Its only March, but I've felt like it has been at least a year. Funny how I feel that time is slowing down itself.

I'm not working in Cherating anymore. Never thought I'd miss that small little town by the edge of the continent this much! Now that I am away from the ocean, during the nights that I find it hard to sleep, I'd close my eyes and try to hear the sound of the waves inside my mind. Back then, there were times that, if I couldn't sleep, I would open up my door and walk to the the beach, and sit on the sand until the the coldness in the air, the noise of the waves, and the darkness of the late night consumed my leftover energy, and it would be easy for me to fall asleep right away. A good hour would normally suffice for me to feel tired and walk back to my room. 

I never had to worry about safety there. everyone knows everyone. It didn't take long, even for me--who was considered as an outsider, to get to know everyone in Cherating; and vice-versa. When I said I was an outsider, it is because I wasn't born and raised there. I only worked there for a good year. 

I am currently living in Petaling Jaya; somewhere. Form here on, I shall not reveal exactly where am I living and where am I working like I used to before. Life do have funny turns here and there. I remember I once  wrote a tiny-bitty-bit about a friend I made from this blog, Nick. We used to talk over Yahoo Messenger, and then stopped talking because I ran off and hid myself. One fine afternoon when I was in Cherating, I just felt like logging into my Yahoo Messenger, and he asked, "where are you?". It took me a while to recall his identity, since he also asked a few questions regarding stuffs that I only told to very few people on this Earth; yet there I was in front of the screen thinking, "who the hell is this guy and how come he knows so much?!" We've kept in touch since, with random text and calls every now and then. Now that I've moved here, he turns out to be living just a block away... What are the odds, yes?

Working during the office hours, off days on weekends; the typical. I am joining the mainstream of the zombies! :D

I used to have uniforms as my working attires, but now it is shirts or blouses and slacks. Everybody come in in the morning, some with their wet hair freshly out of the shower. I am always one of the early ones to be in the office. Us, the early birds, would take our sweet time to sip our morning coffee and read the newspaper in the pantry. Its funny to watch the usual late-comers. every single day, without fail, they will arrive hastily to the office, huffing and puffing, trying to breathe life into themselves; and they put such a sorry face, as if today is the first time ever that they are late for work, and as if being late was something very unroutined for them to do. I wonder how do they start their days. Is this common practice because of the usual devil, the "snooze" option on the alarm clocks? Of course, there're also the ever-burdened ones. These are the colleagues who walks into the office with tight faces, and if you ask them if there is anything wrong, the answer would be, "aku bizi la hari ni... Kena buat blablablabla...(I'm really busy today... I've to finish blablabla...)". All of these makes me wonder; if it is all in a day's work, then why all the huff and puff and haste and the tight faces? Chill, y'all!

And so, everybody would start working on their responsibilities of the day at their own paces that they are comfortable with. For me, the first half of the day is always the least productive. I don't really feel like I'm working until it's after lunch. It's always after lunch hour that everybody is working at the most effective pace. It's everyday's story, indeed. I guess this is because we all know that we finishes all of the task-of-the-day before it's time to be off-duty, we can spare a good ten minutes loafing around in the pantry, of fix our hair, or pack our bags, and get ready to go home. 

Once I have tagged out of the building, I'd go for my dinner before going home. Dinner is getting dull, nowadays. Its always a stop at one of these tomyam joints, and they all taste just the same. I guess all of these restaurants get their tom yam paste from the same supplier. All the way since the days that I was in the uni, the majority of my dinner has been at one of these restaurants. Kuala Selangor, Shah Alam, Seremban, Cherating, and now Petaling Jaya... They are everywhere! By the end of the day, I'd just surrender the urge that I get from my palate for good food, and its the usual nasi putih and tom yam ayam/sup daging/sup ekor, or nasi goreng cina; sometimes accompanied by telur dadar.

If I'm complaining about outside food, why don't I cook then? Well, cooking is no fun if I'm just cooking for myself. Besides, its cheaper to eat outside than to cook for just one person. Its only if I am at my hometown that I would Google up recipes and try something new. I've been wanting to make some pizzas for the longest time, and my last visit to my hometown, which was during last Chinese New Year, I tried it, but failed miserably. The problem was just the yeast that I used. At first, the dough refused to rise no matter how long I waited. After four hours (it was supposed to be only for half an hour), my mother took out another packet of yeast from her cabinet, and asked, "Adik guna yeast expired tu. Yang baru beli dok ada sini (You used the one that has passed expiry date. The new pack is here),"
Sigh... Oh well. So I added the fresh yeast from the fresh pack into the dough, and forgot about it the whole night. The next morning, I opened up the container's lid; dear God, the dough now looked like nothing but a mess. It rose too much, that it looked like a good miniature model sea caves and cavities. Again, with my mother to the rescue, "buang saja la, tak jadi dah tu (just throw it away now, it's not going to bake nice)", in the dough went into the bin.

So.. I'm not really sure where this is going, but I think I am slowly being absorbed into the course of the  Malaysian mainstream, with such a typical daily routine, and am slowly turning into one of the zombies.

Well... there is no need to see the faces of customers directly, and give them answers, and every task can wait until the very last minute, before someone at the higher level makes some noise, and while everybody else are having a good time doing other things on weekends, so can I! But somehow, I just can't make up my mind! Working on weekdays and day offs on weekends seems like a big break from shift rotations and all the mess that comes along with being a hotelier, but something seems lacking. Am I being arrogant if I say, that there is no thrill to such a safe job? It's kind of boring...

I guess what I miss about that old, insane, excuse of a job, is how it always keep my mind preoccupied all the time. My head was always thinking of stuffs like, "will housekeepers get the room ready in time today?", or, "Do I have enough double-bedded rooms for tomorrow's guests?" or, "what can I do to help to achieve the season's target?", etc. I never really had the room to feel empty. No weekends, only once-a-week day offs which I usually spent with kak Shima. No Hari Raya, no Christmas holiday, not a single public holiday. All of the leave days were accumulated; to be later claimed during the hotel's low season. If I ever felt like crying, I always had a place in my mind to run to; which was work.

Still, God's willing, there are so many roads that are yet to be taken, yet to be traveled on. :)

Here's a camwhore picture:

this is as large as it can get