Friday, May 4, 2012

How To NOT Be an Irritating Housemate.

I had a roommate, but she quit her job to work in her hometown, so now I'm staying alone in my room.

Throughout the higher learning years when I've been moving around places, I've switched rental houses many, many times.
I think many people have had these experience, aye?

Now, if you're a students who have to take a student loan to pay off your exam fees and feed yourself, you're basically POOR. You can't rent, or let a lone buy a whole house just for yourself. As for me, I didn't want to stay in the uni's hostel because they suck. Not saying that rental places are damn nice, but at least they suck less than a fucking dormitory. I was fucking 21! Who stays in a dorm at that age, goddamnit?!

I've exchanged houses, and exchanged housemates, and I have to say that I have came across TONNES of irritating behaviours!!

... Well, maybe I was an irritating housemate too, but hell if I know? I only know how to make comments on others! :p

So, here are things you can do to make other people's life more bearable while they have to live with you.



1. Take  turns to clean to goddamn bathroom.



I can't stand a bathroom with yellow floor and mouldy tiles! It's.. it's.. I don't know.
Well, let's look at it like this. A bathroom is a place where you go to wash yourself thoroughly, and to get yourself cleaned. If the bathroom looks like, I don't know, a glimpse of hell, maybe, then how the hell can you go in there to take a shower? You don't come out cleaner, but you come out with potentials to get diseases! How the hell can you even keep your toothbrush in that fucking bathroom? EWW!!

For example, say there are six of you morons sharing a house, and there's one bathroom, and one toilet. Now, each of you use both of these at least twice per day. You definitely cannot NOT clean it AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK! 

Residues of body wash, soap, shampoo, conditioner, hair wax and God knows what other slimy products that we use on ourselves don't just get drained down; especially conditioners. After a while, the residues build up on the floors' tiles and he floor gets slimy and grimy and mouldy, and you slip and fall and die! Well, you got the easy way out if you just fall and die, AT LEAST.

How can you sit on a toilet seat that is all yellow when it is supposed to be white?! You are not your friend's mother, so chances are, you don't know where have they gone, and what have they been doing; because you just simply don't care anyway! So, are you THAT interested to catch some weird rash on your ass?? For all you know, your housemate might be leaving traces of mercury on the seats... 

weird rash on the ass


SO BRUSH THE TOILET! No angel is going to come down from heaven to do it for you! You're a poor student, remember?! so you have no maid either! And your housemates are not your maids either!! So take turns to clean them! Don't be a princess, thinking that you can't clean the bathroom because you're too goddamn high to do it, because your shit is just as smelly!
The same principles apply for the floor in the bedroom and in the kitchen.

It's purely common sense to wash your dish, you ass.



2. Take out the trash, you moron....

I am going to be brutally honest on this. The worst I've came across was trash not taken out to the point where maggots were crawling out of the bags...

I shall say that I was equally guilty!

But no amount of classes, assignments, or exams can be an excuse for you guys to not throw out the trash, especially if there are food waste in there.

If you are juggling with all of the mentioned, and still have time to apply three different colours of eyeshadows before going out for classes, you DEFINITELY have time to take out the trash bags! Nuff said.

the strut and the poise and the fab make no point if you have maggots crawling out out of your trash back at home...



3. Nobody wants to listen to the stupid songs on YOUR fucking playlist!!

Now, here's another irritating habit that you might have committed. This did not just happen in the house, it could have happened while you were sitting in a train, even!

Seriously, if you like to listen to songs while doing just about everything, get a pair of goddamn earphones!! Don't leave the playlist running on the speakers of your laptops, or phones, or any other players that you have! It's irritating! Nobody wants to listen to you (possibly poor) choices of music! 

There were many times when I got SUPER irritated when a housemate who liked to play Akon's songs OUT LOUD from her laptop's speaker, and goddamnit, she didn't spot even after being TOLD to keep her music to herself!! YOU ASSHOLE!! I HATE YOUR STUPID SONGS!! You feel like listening to them out loud, then go find a cave and hide in there and play all you want! Don't make me throw stones at you!

I mean, one or two songs to be shared is nice, but bombarding the whole house for two hours straight with lousy songs, whereby the lyrics only screams about drinking and partying and having sex is just RETARDED!!
IT'S CALLED NOISE POLLUTION. STOP IT!

Speaking of noise, I'll tell you one annoying experience I had with one of my ex-roommate.

I have trouble falling asleep when I'm too tired, and when I finally do fall asleep, nothing irritates me more than being woken up by annoying sound. So, this ex-roommate of mine was a midnight owl. She used to just stay up late till the dawn breaks. I don't give a damn if any of my housemates prefers to stay up all night long or whatever, but what irritated me was that she never let me turn off the lights in the room because she was scared of the dark! Bitch, I need my sleep! I have to go to my class at eight in the morning tomorrow! I told her to to the living room if she want the lights on, and her answer was, "I'm scared of being in the living room all alone by myself." SERIOUSLY!! WHAT THE FUCK, BITCH?!
It's not my problem if you're scared of the dark!
What are you scared of??
GHOST??!
BITCH, GHOST ARE SCARED OF YOU!!

But wait, I haven't come to the noise part yet!
After a few days, I got used to sleeping with the lights on. But it was like she couldn't see me sleeping peacefully or something, she started playing games on her laptops, with the sound turned on to the MAX and woke me up a few times...



GOD JUST KILL ME NOW I CAN'T STAND THIS ANYMOREEEE!!!!!


4. Touch not what is not yours.

Now, this is the one issue I have no experience on. During the many times of exchanging housemates, I've never met one that likes to take or use others' stuffs without permission, but my friend have told me this story:
I'll call my friend Sue. Sue once had a room mate. The bitch just moved in for about two days then. She came back from work to find that bitch was sleeping with Sue's teddy bear in her arms. Well, doesn't sound that bad, right? But hey, two minutes later, Sue noticed that her comb and her body lotion was on the bitch's dressing table. Seriously, bitch! She just moved in, and she's already taking other's stuffs without permission? Obviously she has some issues with her manners...
It didn't just stop there. She started wearing Sue's clothes! I know that Sue should have just told her off, but she never did, because the bitch quit after about three weeks, taking Sue's hairdryer with her. :p

But really! It's like the rule of thumb that sticks in the back of our goddamn heads that when we are living in a rental house, the space is the only thing that we share without having to ask permission; besides the households that we mutually agreed to share; like a water boiler or the TV. If you ran out of toothpaste or shampoo or you are to borrow a hanger or a pad, YOU HAVE TO ASK THE OWNER'S PERMISSION because it's not your to be used as you please.

Your housemates and you didn't come out from the same mother! Remember that!

The previous roommate that I had before the last one; we came to the point where we just bought stuffs like detergent and toothpaste in big packs and then share and split the money, as there were just the two of us, and we really didn't mind. Good idea, eh?


5. Keep your weird friends who are not your housemates off the house!! ...unless you're having an open-house day.. or something...

Keep'em off!! Don't bring in strangers, especially weird-looking ones, to your place. Respect each others' preferences. If it's an all-girl house; bitch, please, go and fuck your boy in the motel or something. Not everyone in the house is okay with you bringing your boyfriend home.

If my memory is right, it was in mid 2008, that I was looking for a rental place because I moved out of the hostel. Already paid the deposit and the rent for the first month for this room near my uni. It was a flat unit with three rooms, two bathrooms, one living room, and one kitchen. Obviously it was on a sharing basis. I've never been to the house; just agreed to take the spot based on a friend's recommendation, who was already living there for a couple of months. Just a week before I moved in, my friend was like, "you know what... I think I'm moving out of the place, and I don't think you'd want to stay there. The girls are bringing their boyfriends for... sleepovers..."

Fuck you, bitches. Why don't you bring your boyfriends for sleepover at your mother's house, damnit?!

Anyway, I called it off, let whatever I paid for be burnt, and looked elsewhere.
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I don't know if I have ever been annoying, because nobody said anything to me. I think the only annoying part about me is my loud mouth. I'm irritatingly blunt. I also like to throw my things here and there. I'll put my cap on the desk, keys on the tv, tumbler on the couch... I'm messy, but never dirty, tho!

Right now I have no roommate. I'm staying alone in my room, as my roommate just quit from the resort, like I said earlier. Staying alone is boring, to.. I have nobody to babble with when I come home from work. The TV is never on anymore, because I never watch TV, and my ex roomie watched the news daily.

So it's kinda quiet here right now. :(